The Other Reality...

I've just finished talking to Luke

i dont mind saying his name cause i know he doesnt mind having it said

and i talked to him about the dream i had last night

because this dream was quite possibly the most epic

and real feeling dream i've ever had ever

when i awoke i was in a total state of terror and excitement

and my heart was beating really fast

i dont want to have to retype it all

so i'll just copy what i wrote to luke

bare in mind that this was directed at him

so do not be confused by the context of the writing

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Well i'd love to stay and chat but.. you're a total bitch says:

i have to tell you about the dream i had last night

it was the most realistic, visually and sensorally fantastic dream i've ever had

and it had everything thought out

see i was 20

and i was in an international school in iran

cause by then iran and palistine arent in war anymore

(or so they say)

and a massive and very expensive school was built in iran

a few hundred meters off the border of palistine

and eveyones having fun and enjoying this fantastic facility

that is world renowned

and for some reason u and amy and siv are there

we're in the outer yard on campus

to our right is the massive main building

and to the left are dorms and a massive church

and a siren goes off

and everyone panics

cause we dont even know what it is

but u see a large light object i nthe sky

and it comes towards us

hit the ground about 20 meters away and theres a hughe explosion

it was an artillery shell

and the girls freak out

and we get bombarded

everywhere

bomb goin on

and i know i was terrified

it seemed so real

and another comes straight at us

and u and i dive backwards

but the girls are hit

and decintegrated

but trheres no time to mourne

cause more are coming

and we fucking run

towards the church side

and its like playing black ops

and its a cutscene

your just running while bombs are goin off

and the camera turns

to show u a massive rocket hitting the main building

and shit like that

and we run

to the nearby neighbourhood

and people have abandonened their houses

abandoned*

and we grab as much suplies as we can

find some rifles

mines the scar f-5

yours is an m4 carbine

and its like a red dawn situation

the palitinians are coming

and we're gonna survive

and then i woke up

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

it happened as is

and it made me feel all confused as to its meaning all day

but then again dreams dont need to have a meaning =P

thats is all i wanted to share

its fucking hot

ALL THE TIME

Sunshine on a Rainy Night

for all intensive purposes

its meant to be summer

or atleast

just

but

even though it is summer

the days get colder

and moreso do the nights and wet

very wet

i've grown into the habit of going out at night with my guitar

and meeting out with the same two guys

at parks

mostly the one near my house

and we'd sit around

and play

and more often then not

there isnt a cloud in the sky

The Sky at night

-A window into the vastnest that is space

where all the stars and dark form a dotted cover

one that leaves me in absolute amazement

everytime i look up

-A reminder that we are but the smallest most

insignificant piece of nothing compared to the universe

dont forget it ...

the first night that we went out there

i saw 4 shooting stars

it was the first time ever

that i can remember anyway

and it absolutely amazed me

the sky amazes me

and never ceases

to do so

today i went with just one of them

to the park on Wilson road

across the road from the mosque

it was nice

it was raining but

so we took shelter under the

play house thingy

no guitars today

we just talked

reminisced about older better days

talked about how complicated things have gotten

and just really had a proper talk about life

and what aspects we have

it was nice

and heavy at the same time

Why does life have to be like this?

is it...

because of god?

fuck no what does that lazy fuck have to do with it?

because of society?

well yes because society has set these paradigms that make it almost impossible to handle being alive anymore

because of my parents?

well they are annoying but they just want what they think is best (key words: what they think)

its

because of me

and i hate to do this

but its because of my melancholy

^ thats right im talking about Hamlet

but different its modern

its me

seeing opportunities

knowing that things need to be done

but they arent getting done

i'm not lazy

its just

that when it comes to these things

i get confused

i think too far ahead

and i think too much

and then i fail

and i loose my chance

completely

and it hurts

evey single day

it hurts

more and more

and theres nothing i can do

not yet

just have to live with it for now

its not just me

alot of people feel this way

and all i can to you is

that this is life

you cant change that

even if its shit

to some unexplainable extent

you cant change the fact that this is how life is

so people turn to drastic measures

if your thinking about it

don't

don't even

go there

life sucks fair enough

and i know its chliche

but ending it early

is not the answer

and i'll tell you why

its not because of how it'll effect those around

no fuck that who are they to get in your way?

its not because 'life is precious' fucking hell thats a load of shit

thousands of people die every day

MILLIONS of living things die every second

life is not fucking precious

and if it is WHO TO?

no

you dont want to kill yourself

because

it wont help

it wont help you

life is shit

and you cant change that

killing yourself wont change the fact that life is shit

you will be helping noone

especially not yourself

and besides

there is always time

there are always options

to find the light within the drab dark

i find that at night

things are clearer to see

in my head

i walk around during the day

and see colours

lots of colours

but colours get in the way

its a distraction

at night

i can see true form

what things really are

what is ugly

and what is not

and in my head

i can see this

and determine between the two

it helps

navigate the whirlpool ocean of my life

theres no much i need to do now that the hsc is over

so much

1-exercise

2-lose weight (as a result of exercise)

3-get a job

4-get better at guitar

5-get better at singing

6-move out

7-lose my job

8-move back in

9-return my shit to school

10-Get The Girl

and on that note

i've gtg

bye for now

The Internal Clock

short

short

short

short

Short

ShorT

SHORT

SHORT!

...

post today

all i'll say is

i used this blog

as the basis for my short story in the hsc

belonging =D

and

if the readers of my blog/creative writing

happen to be the same person/people

then know that yes

alot of it is from here

and i can assure you that it is all my my own workings

my own expulsions from my own mind

and incase someone else has gone and done the same thing

id like to say

20903961

Minh Luan Nguyen

but you can call me Danny =D

btw i believe its not against the rules to use

my own blog post as my creative writing

since i was the one creating it

think of it as...

i have been working on my creative writing for about one and a half years now

^^

Sometimes The Day Begins With Nothing to Look Forward to...

today was the first test of many to come

english paper 1

the test all students would be doing at the exact same time as us

and i was adequately prepared

recently all my post have been...

well dark to say the least

and well things just were not looking good at all

at all

but sometimes the universe can throw you a good one

one that you can hit straight out of the ball park

and thats what i got

there is a person i know

who

is just amazing

in every single way

she is utterly amazing

and i have no other way of putting it

at all

so

i havent seen her in some time

i have missed her dearly

i have looked forward to our reunion today

in fact it was the only thing i wanted to go to school for today

to see people

and mostly to see her

and for good reason

she came over and gave me a belated birthday present

4 months

but whos counting

point is

i completely did not expect it

we went in did the test

and well

i really couldnt think in the test about anything but her

and so the creative side in me came out and i aced it

came home

and the present

came with a card

that was in the form of palm cards

all neatly typed up

with her message to me in it

and it almost made me cry

you words were beautiful

and i wont forget it

but as if it werent sufficient enough

i still had a present

and i opened it

and found

the most thoughtful and wonderful gift i have ever received by anyone

ever

and well

i dont know how to say it really

but i know your reading

and i want you to know

that you

are the most

wonderful

beautiful

thoughtful

otherwords that end in 'ful'

amazing

awesome person

i have ever had the

opportunity to meet

i love you dearly more then you'll ever know

and if i had to choose one person i'd see the end of the world with it'd be you

so

thank you

from the bottom of my heart

because

you give me hope

when times are hard

and you told me that

even when theres nothing to look forward to

there it is

right in front of me

bright and vivid

quietly waiting

just as i imagined it would be...

lots of love always

Danny

Even the Sheep Are Beast...

And There It Is

another year

but this is different

this time

we're not coming back

oh the past few months have been

...

enlightening

oh how we wish things were different

but you cant change time

time wont change

the arrogant fuck

and time wont change

because people don't

you can only put up a front for so long

after which you will be exposed

so the training wheels come off

all of them

get back up on your feet idiot

now is not a time to fall

but

now that they have no wheels to keep them stable

the boundaries drop

and so the mask

'look who it is!'

'wait'

'no its not is it?'

no its not...

its not who you thought it was

you want it to be

but its not

they are perfect

perfect perfect perfect

in your head

perfect

the friends you truly do not deserve

so good to you

that even you can dissmiss their flaws

but what if they aren't as perfect as they seem?

oh we like to pretend

but they slip up

and the glass breaks

and u can see

behind the mask

sometimes the mask will break off gradually

and you begin to see the ugly truth behind it

and sometimes

the mask just falls off in one go

leaving you shocked at what you see

so shocked you cant react

and what do i do?

when i'm in an alleyway

with no possible escape

because i thought i was running away

from something

but it didnt matter

because i was running with you...

then you pull out the knife and i'm now running from you

how ironic

i guess something that takes SIX YEARS to learn

can be reversed

at the last second

and the sheep

will become the beast in the full moon

and the hunters in the eleventh hour

nature is a funny isn't it?

what is nature

nature is nature

but nature isnt

trees

and birds

and animals

and waterfalls

no

nature

is

lying

stealing

cheating

perverting

and back stabbing

this is nature

human nature

and it is imbued into human society

and has been for so long

i therefore cant blame you for being that way

and the fucked thing is

i saw

all of this coming

and there was nothing i could do

just a sitting home on the coast

watching as the tsunami came ever closer

and the people sent to protect him...

abandon him

so save their own hides

so sweet the sound of silence

i must admit

there are a FEW people i'd miss

people who are truly honest to their nature

there is one who i know is definitely going to be missed

she is a friend who i can trust

who i can talk to all the time

i've mentioned her in the blog before

but in the end of the year

shes leaving

for Japan

and Shannon

i must say your words of wisdom

calm wit

and beauty will definitely be missed

more then you'll ever know

and i wish you all the luck in the world

for your endeavours

you deserve only the best

well that concludes the high school chronicles

in a few weeks

is the HSC test

where the education big wigs

pitt student against student

to watch the suffering and make bets on who dies first

...

should be fun

The Paradoxitaur

The Paradoxitaur: a mythical creature that only exist if you do not believe in it!

-Demetri Martin

Fantastic!

so

life

has been getting

well...

Difficult

i guess to say in the least

human emotions are what bare me down

human emotions

that have the ability to make even the strongest man

weak

and cry

and as I stand and blink my way through my problems

nothing gets resolved

i am the Hamlet of My receding Denmark

even now

as I think of it

the pain hits the eyes

but the brain says I'm a man

'This nonsense must stop!'

and so instead we die a little inside

I wish it wasnt like this

and i dont know if i'll be able to handle it

i mean imagine everything that could go wrong

going wrong

ALL AT ONCE

wrong

wrong

wrong

wrong

wrong

WRONG!

That's What They Say

That's What They'll Tell You

...

Accept it

but the minor parts in the play speak out of Term

the adlibbing is out of control

and it gets harder to direct the epic theatre massacre

so just go with it

go home

take the pills to sleep

lay in bed

pills dont work

and pretend to dream

I hope they like it

I Really Do...

Then He Initiates Something / Intern She / Saves Him Internally Thereafter.

I / Can Anticipate Not Truly / Seeing This And Nevertheless Dying / Inside Turmoil.

I'm / Just Utterly Stupid Too.

What Are Not Truths / Tend Only / Lean Ears And Voice, Eventually/ I Try / And Lack Luster

*stops here*

so there my humanity on a plate

deal with it

I'll have to anyway

Just wish it was easier.

and i could tell you your making a mistake

but your happy

who am I to get in the way of that?

ON LIGHTER NEWS

a very good friend of mine

i''ve mentioned her before

the 'gamer in disguise'

although shes shown her true colours and is no longer 'in disguise'

has finished her music HSC exam and said its done great

and I'm sure it has

i'm so very happy for her

and wish her well in her future endeavours

^^

So

recently i've been talking to this awesome friend of mine in year 11

shes one of the only year 11ners who i can even stand to look at

all the rest

are either too stupid to realise they needed to leave

and ergo are stupid ass fucking louts who do nothing but what they want to do regardless on consequence on others

OR

are fucking idiot posers who think they're cool by acting like a fucking 'scene' person

or something stupid like that

basically dressing up like an asshole

thinking its cool

and thinking they're cool because they pretend to not care that others might think they're cool

(even though they dont)

that is my breakdown on the entire 11th grade

deal with it

so newho

this girl

Jessie M.

i mention her name in the hope that she'll read this and get excited

turns out she enjoys a good zombie invasion survival plan as much as i do

now if you have read my previous blogs

you'll know that i've recently had dreams about zombie invasions

viral infections that spread the zombie disease etc

point is

we got it all planed out so yeah

and the more u talk about it

the more you actually want it to happen

i'm sure we;re wrong and it wont happen as we say it will

but who cares its nice to pretend

makes me forget my other problems anyways

so thankyou Jessie ^^

a friend of mine is going through

a similar problem as me

but dare i say

without the added knives

to him

if he were to read this

i say

hang in there buddy ^^

I WAS THINKING!

i've been watching alot of Demetri Martin lately

and the guy is a genius

i mean granted sometimes he makes lame jokes

but he is really talented

and pretty much can do everything

and i was wondering

what would life be like

if i had the power to make anything i wanted happen

anything

even if it disregards the bounds of physics

magic =D

now

i know

if i were to destroy the bounds of physics even for a small amount

it may well cause a rip in the quantum layer

causing the small quantum rips that form to get larger (as strings cant stop all of them)

and then open a wormhole to another dimension and cause the two (or more) to collide

and BANG

second big bang

who knows what could happen!

but enough technical shit

how fucking awesome would that be?

'oh shit im late for school!'

*ZIP* turn back time

NOW IM NOT!

of course then theres the paradoxical nature of time travel

SHUTUP DANNY

newho

'oh shit i forgot to get such and such a present!'

*PUFF* they dont exist anymore and never did

wait

i mean

*PUFF* A WILD PRESENT APPEARS!

'Quickly catch it!'

point is

like would be so much more easier

ah wells

we cant get what we want

i'll leave you with a quote from Bright Eyes

Center of the World:

In the middle of the day

when you drive home to your place from that job that makes you sleep
back to the thoughts that keep you awake long after
night has come to claim any light that still remains
in the corner of the frame that you put around her face.
Two pills just weren’t enough.
The alarm clock is going off,
but you are not waking up.
This isn’t happening, happening, happening, happening, happening. It is.

What is In the NAME...

Name?

i have none

not for you people anyways

but there is one name that replays in my head

and i must say i neglected to mention her in my previous blog of beautiful people

BECAUSE

SHE should already know that she is completely and utterly AMAZINGLY BEAUTIFUL

and its

well i mean ridiculously beautiful so beautiful

and she just

SO BEAUTIFUL that it hurts

anywho

this girl

did complain a bit

and made me feel so bad about it

even though i told her that she should know that i already love her

*sigh*

i know your reading this

and i want u to know u cut me real bad there

i died a little inside

*sigh*

but no

i have no words to describe her

she takes my breath away

and i'm lost for words

she is...

well beautiful as i've mentioned

kind

smart

hilarious

strong

but lazy

dependable (most of the time)

someone u can trust

someone u can lean on if it gets hard

and in return likes to lean back

she laughs and i laugh cause she's just like that

she doesn't like being still for too long

like me

sometimes she'll just be completely high

and go on laughing rages

she is

someone i like

someone i cherish

someone i get excited to see

someone i depend on

someone i

love

and she is just super-crazy-mega-amazing

and i am honoured to have her in my life

you know who u are

and this ENTIRE blog post is dedicated completely to you

usually a i do a 'I was Thinking' bit

but i'm only thinking about u ^^

there u go are u happy now?

Its a HARDknock life for US

now

i have lots of people in my life

and belive me

most of them are idiots

like seriously

real idiots

BUT

there are a few

who are just beautiful

and its not often u come across a beautiful person

and im lucky to have so many in my life

dont get me wrong

i do hate humanity

i mean

the worse thing to happen to humanity

happens to be humanity itself

and of course its the worse thing for the planet

for the animals and plants

but i digress

there are a select few beautiful people in my life

when i say beautiful

i dont just mean pretty

i mean all round

real girls and guys

with real life

and issues that they dont deserve

and to all of you in school

i say that u must hang in there, cause school will be over is a few weeks

and we can deal with it together

ill be a bit more specific

no names

--------------------------------------------------

there is a girl i know

who works sooo fucking hard

on everything

on studying

on being smart

on being great

on being the best friend she can

on being the girl you can rely on

on being in the loop

on being in the group

...

on being

...

on time

and she

is so stressy

and deservingly so

she shouldnt try so hard

cause she doesnt even need to

shes beautiful and i like her this way

if you know me

then you know who this person is

--------------------------------------------------

theres someone i know

and she doesnt read my blog and i dont mind

she has her own shit

she too works really hard

but its not just that

she is funny

she is sweet

she is caring

she is mindful of others

she is Fun

she is always happy

she is beautiful

and

she is always sure that

she is there for you when you need her

i know this seems generalised but if u know her like i do then u know who she is

i love this girl she is the best =D

--------------------------------------------------

there is a guy i know

and i've known him for a while

and he is

well how to describe him without giving away too much

this guy is

a smart ass

a friend when u need him

a man when u need him

a girl when u need him to be

a sensitive guy

a hard guy

a mouth

a large ear as well

a hairy beast (the ultimate clue)

a parader

a poser

a treasure hunter/adventurer

a funny as fuck guy

a pro gamer

...

a hell of

...

a friend to us all and i love him too =)

--------------------------------------------------

there is this girl i know

and i've mentioned her in my blog before

but the message doesnt ever get received

because like the rest of the girls my age

she is so downtrodden on herself

and i cant fathom it at all

but she doesnt know

cause

truth is she is so amazing

truth is she is so vibrant

truth is she is so beautiful

truth is she is so funny

truth is she is so awesome

and

the

truth is she is so bloody unaware that the

truth is she is so fucking all those things put into one making her so fucking great

she is

a truly amazing person

i hope you see this

--------------------------------------------------

there is a dude i know

who i've known for quite some time

and hes is the biggest smart ass ever

and im afraid i made him this way

well partially responsible anyway

and hes just this guy who always knows the answers to the questions that you ask but dont care about

but it doesnt matter

this guy is

the awesome counterpart

the writer of evil

the instigator of conversation

the carrier of comedy

the undoer of idiocy

the breaker of dullness

the receiver of praise

and

the captain, my captain

--------------------------------------------------

so i know this girl

and i've known her too for soo long even though we havnt always been close

even now we're not that close

but i do see her as amazing

she recently had some issues involving one tree hill if you get my drift

and its taken its toll

and she has so much doubt about herself

and it makes me sick

how people can let other people affect them so much

or indeed affect others in this way

she seems to not be happy

but i want to just tell her

that i honestly do feel that she is one of the most amazing people i know

cause she's smart

cause she's joyful

cause she's happy (most of the time)

cause she's fun

cause she's strong minded

cause she's awesome

cause she's stylish

cause she's so damn beautiful

and

cause she's so oblivious that we all love her

cause she is who she is

and that's all we can really ask of her and all we really need

---------------------------------------------------

there is another girl i know

who has also been having some one tree hill issues

or gossip girl idk both those shows are pretty shit

point is

she had the means and mind

to go in and say

wait

there's a problem here

and tried to fix it

and i think even though she was already amazing

that she is even more so

but also she

tries to be the best she can - but shouldnt have to

tries to be strong - but lets herself cry

tries to be resilient - but is only human

tries to be modest - but she knows shes beautiful

tries to be calm - but is fun and happy

tries to be social - but still works so fucking hard

tries to be the one who

tries to be herself all the time

- but she is simply amazing the way she is when she just doesnt

try to be anything

and i'm not that close to this girl either but these things are the absolute truth

---------------------------------------------------

Everyday - everyday i wake up

and hear you whisper my name...

maybe breathe a little prayer

but it just aint the same -

ignoring every word you say

Every word ...you tell me

- This Providence

---------------------------------------------------

Last but not least

there is a girl

i know

who

i've known since as long as i can remember

well not really

but i wish i did

cause shes is super-crazy-mega-awesome-ness

all in one

just quite seriously

awesome central

=D

^ that face is the only way to describe her

so

=D awesome

=D amazing

=D fun

=D funny

=D intense

=D insane

=D Really pretty

=D Ridiculously beautiful

and

=D has a smile that

=D Halts the word so that all may see her glow in the pathetic dark that is society

i've known her for a while but we've grown apart

dear gammer in disguise - in regret that we've grown apart

i wish i could change this but i feel you've outgrown me

i'm glad that we still talk though

but i guess it'll never be the same.

---------------------------------------------------

there you have it

it wasn't easy writing this blog

i mean sure i did repeat some adjectives but believe me they mean different things for different people

all these people i see every school day

and i do feel that the people around them take them for granted

i love these people dearly and wouldn't changed them for anyone else ever

--------------------------------------------------

i guess its back to regular viewing then =)

--------------------------------------------------

so

I Was Thinking

what would happen

and i've been thinking about this ALOT

in a zombie infestation

*hmmm*

now people say

that its the fatties that die first

and sure i might

but i think not

cause

even though i may be slow i have fighting spirit =)

but

its not the point

i have tatics

smarts

brains

wits

teamwork

and most importantly

weapons

people think 'GUNS GUNS GUNS!'

but they over look the importance of

1- tactical movement

2- close range low disruption killing

the only way to not die is to not get swarmed

and thats the bar of it

now personally

what i'd do

is

see what my family is doin

and i've thought about it

i'll kill all and any zombies that i have to

i dont care if they're related to me

or even one the people i've mentioned above

u try to eat me u die simple as that

grab my bag and some supplies

now i'd bring

my mobile in case

(including charger headphones etc)

cause i dont wanna get bored on travels

my laptop (inc charger etc)

now u might way 'thats dumb it'll be heavy and weigh you down'

well yes

but

shut the fuck up

cause u find some wi-fi

and u try to contact the world

and also

if ur forced to camp down

u'll wanna be able to have some entertainment

also grab some non-perishables

(noodles - baked beans - musli bars etc)

some fruit for temporary substance

and a large bottle of water

BUT

do not drink the water as of yet because u do not know if the infection is in the taps

better off getting some new bottled water

i'd then spend maybe 2-5 minutes calling all the important people

grab my car or any car

drive round picking up all my friends who arent zombies

kill any who are (cause i dont want my friends eating others)

drive em all to kenans house

which is in the middle of nowhere

well not really but its on a farm land place

and its got high windows and balconies for scouting to happen

and camp out there till we can sort some shit out

eventually we'd have to leave and keep moving

by the time we decide to leave the zombie population will have either

died out

or grown immensly

either way

w/e

confidence is the way to live =D

and i know it all seems elaborate and excessive

but im a guy

and guys think about these things

guys give serious though to

'i wonder what i'd do if a rocket came out of that alley right now... yeah i think i'd handle the situation quite well' - Mr Moran

its just in our nature =)

and on that note

i'm off

bye bye

And the World Will Spin for we will Live ON

the title you say?

well i just mad it up its definitely NOT from the bible

as if the writer of the bible could come up with fiction they didnt plagiarise from nature

its still cold

and how we wallow in our misery

who has the feelings to leave the house anymore?

and for what?

promise of being robbed slowly by smiling thieves all dressed in corporate uniforms

promise of having your lungs thoroughly pumped of all oxygen

and replaced with a toxic tar concoction atmosphere and future destitute

promise of social pariahism where people make allies to spite you

you just cant rely on people anymore

so lets blog

blog

blog

blog

blog

blog

how is everyone?

good

thats good

continue on the road

the road to the place

which we want to go

but

on the way

we find that

circumstance ...

will push us

and pull us

and although we may fight

with all our might

we just find

that in our minds

people just

fight like us

and we hear

in both ears

that theres no fight left

and so

comes death

sorry i had to get all rhymy there

the point is

if at fist you dont succeed

TRY

THE FUCK

AGAIN

because if Trying doesnt kill us

then NOT trying will

in the end we all die

its up to you to decide what manner it is in

someone i know

was telling me he is having a bad day

and he said it as 'week'

i know your reading this so read on

if we over-exaggerate our pain

we find that the pain in your minds

is the pain that we feel

people are weak

humans are extraordinary

we feel emotions

anger

hate

sadness

love

kindness

love

but

its these emotions

that separate us from the animals

and yet

its these emotions

that makes us weak

a depressed guy who stays at home

and tries to do as little socialising as possible

is as much use as a horse with a broken leg

or a meerkat that cant dig

in depressing terms

he is a knife without a blade

no use to anyone

no use to himself

with such a fucking massive capability for emotion

we're so susceptible to emotional manipulation

and this is where what i said above comes in

if we tell ourselves that it's bad

then it'll be bad

we find ourselves looking for excuses to make it bad

but

just s fast as we can hurt

we can just as well heal

My good friend and your know who u are

if u find that the days are hard and long

maybe turn to the nights

where in your dreams

u can make it longer

and u can make it not hard

for yourself

but try not to loose yourself in this psychiatric reality

thats all i have to say on the issue

i know someone

i wont tell you her name

but she knows who she is

and this girl

has the classic

teenage school girl psyche

where

she just isnt as pretty as the two girls that she sits next to in maths

but i know the truth

and this is a problem with all these girls

but i know the truth

and she'll tell me that shes definitely not

but i know the truth

and the truth is

out of all the other girls

she is probably one of the most beautiful girls

in the grade

i hope she sees this

I Was Thinking

out of curiosity

who actually cares about politics anymore?

i already lost all hope in politics

i mean politics is nothing but stupid

political garbage chewed up and made scary for the public

and this is what politics offers

'developed nations' politics

is where political protocol has failed the general population

and where am i goin with this?

what im trying to say

is

POLITICS

is everywhere

yet subtle

people will believe the everything the last ad they saw on TV

'OMG DID U SEE TONY ABBOTS FACE IN BLACK AND WHITE ON TV AND IT WAS ALL GRAINY?!'

'YEAH OMG HES GOING TO EAT OUR CHILDREN!'

'I KNEW HE WAS BAD, I JUST KNEW IT, I TOLD EVERYONE THIS AT THE START CAUSE IM THE FUCKING BEST'

'I AM SO GAY'

so makes the daily back and forth between the local Mz Jane Doe and the Newsagent who pretends to care

i'm so tired of politics

remember when Rudd was voted in?

and everyone went mad that a WOMAN was VP?!

well now

and WOMAN is THE P!

and although HER method getting this position is genderly ironic

i do NOT hear that much of a fuss

everyone is too busy BASHING this poor idiot woman because shes NOT MARRIED

and NOT LIVING in a GOVERNMENT SANCTIONED home

THIS IS A COUNTRY

NOT THE FUCKING CATHOLIC CHURCH

although there isnt much difference if u think about it

i must go now

run on the mill

i'm skyping with Andrew

and hes just said that watching Alex is like

watching a baby get a dummy and get it taken away again and get it back then taken away repeatedly and STILL be suprised

lol

who said one cannot find humour over the internet ^^

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaave you met me?

yes that IS a HIMYM reference get with the times ^^

if you'll notice on my last post it says 'something something march'

and on this one it says 'something something june'

thats right kiddies

its been

march, april, may, june...

almost 4! months since i blogged!

i hope my blog remembers who i am =D

the point is

ALOT has happend

well not really

i mean nothing significant

but still alot

since alot rarely happens to me anyway

i've met many a new person

to list some

theres mister

Andrew - the eccentric enigmatic go getter - cristavao

Alan - the tech savvy - portes

alex- the over excited - rodano

and others

but lets just call them LoL buddies for now =D

newho

today is a smile day

i know thats different to what i usually do

but who has time to give a shit about stupid life anymore?

when life gives u lemon

u just shank it and move on like nothing happend

i cant help but zone out everywhere i go

and its usually just fine like:

at a park

in school

at home

at the bus stop

but sometimes one finds that removing oneself from ones own disparaging reality

can have adverse effects such as when i'm :

on my bike

operating heavy machinery

cutting vegetables

playing poker for money

ON the bus

on a train

in an elevator

other placces where its possible to miss a stop

and my all time favourite - driving

how insanely dangerous a person i am ^^

i must say

my school area has become a sesspool

of imorality and ridiculousness

i hang out with people

who

are in the area of 16-18

and seriosuly

they all have 'partners'

yet continuously make passes and flirt with each other

and i dont like sounding like the parents from dirty dancin

but your fucking 17

grow up

i mean if your gonna do it

atleast admit it

dont act like what your doin is not fucking stupid

and like ive mentioned before

i'm still swamped with people

and their one tree fucking hill issues

alllllllllllllllllllll the time!

I DONT CARE

if your boyfriend forgot your 49 hours and fucking 4 minute anniversary

i doubt the person u are crying to cares

stop making a big fucking deal about it

its not a big deal

and whats worse

stop trying to shroud it in secrecy!

like its so super duper secret crazy panic if anyone finds out

so you talk just loud enough for people to hear keyfuckingwords

and there is my rant

deal with it

on a lighter note

school its bad but not so much anymore

why?

well i'll tell you why

you see

i really like cold weather

well not 'like' it per se

but rather

i MUCH rather cold weather than that of

HOT ASS AUSTRALIAN ANYDAY OF THE YEAR EXCEPT FOR A SELECT FEW IN WINTER

weather

and right now

its 3:06 am

and its freezing cold

and im in a shirt and shorts

and i dont mind

cause im not a little bitch

i especially enjoy days where the entire sky is filled with just a massive screen of grey

with a slight tinge of blue

and while everyone is complaining that its too cold or the sun is not out

i just smile

cause on days like this:

people get closer to stay warmer

people don't talk as much (hence stupid shit isnt said)

days seem shorter

leaves will fall

and nature will show us her beauty in the movement of the wind

a beautiful girl is moreso with her hair and scarf blowing in a strong wind

looking at you intently cause she knows that your iminent hug will warm her

at which point you both will be happy and content ^^

so the weather

is good

this is the first day of my life =)

glad i didnt die before i met you

great song look it up

I was thinking

i was watching watchmen the otherday

fantastic movie

i've seen it many times

and people complain alot about how

its:

not a fucking real action movie

doesnt have enough action and too much violence?

was boring

too much talking

and to these people my reply is

your all fucking idiots

you american idiots shouldnt even be allowed to watch cinematic philosophical allegories of this level

but i was wondering, if our world was like that reality

where america won the Vietnam war and the soviets and the americans were at nuclear stalemate

how weird a world we would be living in

then again

the movie doesnt even make mention of australia once so i guess we dont really matter =P

point is

if i was a watchman

i would do things alot differently

i would

destroy america

there u go

finished

no more war

no more terrible media

then send in the un sanctioned army of the UN to fuck up the USSR

great movie

lots of penis

but great movie

featured the avatar prototype in it

liked the prototype better

my god its cold

well i dont have a god

but it is cold

and apparently it is gods fault

good night all

time to go do some late night dishes

then off to bed to dream a lucid dream =D

Reading the Fine print!

So they shuffle you...

into a giant room

and seat u down

your given a number instead of a name

and your not alone there are many there with you

i'd like to say under free will but you know thats not true...

and they give u some forms to fill out and sign

then tell you your instructions

and you panic

you don't want to be there...

but before you know it the person has stopped talking...

...

let the tests...begin

D=

TEST!

and so the sad pathetic teachers find yet another excuse to pit students against each other in a test of smarts wits and endurance to see

WHO steps on who

WHO cheats

WHO willing to go too far

and WHO will come out on top

while they sit in their balcony watching

Smoking their cigarillos and laughing at the misfortune!

but test = fail
im just glad i dont have to go to school for the days that i dont have em

and considering i only have 5 test and the period spans over 20 days

thats pretty sweet =D

last thurday - engineering (which was ridiculously easy cause it was copy pasted from the 2007 hsc test)

last friday - ENGLISH ADV that was a fail test and a half

tuesday - 2 unit maths, i was meant to study today but decided to play assassins creed instead and let me say that the attention to detail is fucking sweet, although some of the battle logic is fucked still a sweet game, ill study tomorrow

next tuesday - physics

next wednesday - legal

i will fail my test and wont care =D

am currently listening to the kill - 30 seconds to mars

its one of those songs that u have to lip sing to (lip sing cause its way too loud and high to actually sing along =P)

man the weather has been fucking fucked in the fucking head

and its been fucking me over

seriously

cause its autumn and i was looking forward to having some goddamn cold weather

instead of the fucking hot spring weather we've been having

and it was cold for a few days at first

THEN

it went back to being hot as shit during the days

but atleast the nights are cooler

but i do most of my living in the day - as i school

fucking fuck!

moving on

OH SHIT I FORGOT

found some goddamn matchbox cars!

holy shit

me and my little bro!

fucking built a giant ass gravity race slide! <- yes it is as awesome as it sounds!

out of books and chairs and shit

aww man

i remember what its like to be a kid ;)

so i went to maccas the other day

i fucking hate it there T_T

its so incredibly depressing

the atmosphere - how it tries so hard to appeal to families

the smell - smells like death

the toilets - you just know your gonna get raped

and most deppresing - the workers - that means you darshna

but the single most depressing and sad thing in there are the managers

how they act so fucking high and mighty

and are such bitches to the younger customers like they're such hot shit

and how they actually look like they're proud of what they're doin

like seriously

i'm standing there as the fat white guy in the darker uniform is yelling at the other employees and talking to them like they're useless 10 yearolds

'have you done it yet? well i asked you to didn't i? do u remember me asking you? should i have to do everything by myself?'

i just wanted to chuck a Brick Tamland and trident the fucker off his high fucking trojan horse!

also i hate that all the managers regardless of what store look like they're related in some way,

they're all fat white people with the chliche hair colours and styles

so thats what pisses me recently

BUT on a sidenote

another thing that pisses me off

is the spell check on google chrome which just told me that i spelt 'colour' wrong

cause it FUCKING ASSMERICANISED

like seriously how lazy can u fucking get 'color'

fuck!

and i noe i can change the settings and i just did

but the point is the american downsyndrome excuse for english pisses me off

I was THINKING

that if i could somehow read minds

life would be so fucking sweet

never make a wrong move

i'd know exactly what to do

and how to push people (H)

awww shit

and id go round saying what people thought

(discretely of course as to not have people discover my abilities)

and embarrass people *insert evil laugh*

ofcourse id need to be able to control it and chose who i listen to

otherwise id go mad

and if people found out it'd be another deal breaker cause if they dont tell everyone and i get sent in for testing or killed by intolerant white people mob led by pauline hanson

then i'd get put up to the task of helping people

helping people who are depressed etc

and i dont mind helping people who are depressed

BUT i dont like being obligated

thats different

people will say with great power comes great responsibility

BULLSHIT

thats not true at all

over 50% of the world population are living on less than 2USD a day!

and where are the fucking rich white people at?

they're living it up on their yachts and penthouses

and every once in a while they'll pull the loose change from they're pockets and put it on a giant check and hand it over to some charity infront of heaps of cameras and pretend to care

and get called heroes by the public cause they don't know any better

so if i had the power to help

then its not my duty to do so

it'd be a choice

in a monetary based world economy

duty and ethics and freedom

are things that don't exist

-the rich get richer and the poor get poorer its just out own fucking society thats done this

and we have noone to blame but ourselves.

OK so i do tangent off a bit

but thats just how i am

this blog is dedicated to Darshna

who begged me for a blog =P

well here it is

enjoy

xo

Fire! on the Dancefloor!...everybody GTFO!

once again

big big gap

last post (million years) this post

but like ive mentioned before

I

Dont
Give

A

Fuck

^^

so

its hot

its 10:19 pm

the moon dominates the sky

and yet it's hot

my room is an oven

plus the evaporated sweat and you get?

a SAUNA! i always wanted one of my own

cept i cant just up and leave this one T_T

so

it was hot

at around 12 pm

midday full of fucking sun

and yet we schooled

and this country is an oven

plus the fucked weather with the inconsistent precipitation

and you get?

a SAUNA! and i always wanted one

yet this one really is ine-fucking-scapable

T_T

wasnt even cool in the morning

it was just heat

constant heat

the whole way

from when i woke up late

till i...

well till now

and it was the weekend yesterday

and so i woke up

walked outside

and my eyes melted

in their sockets

and it was sound like i'm being 'over-dramatic'

but seriously

just come to sydney

for a day

and you wont eve....

you know what fuck you

you don't know what its like =P

so i went to a party on saturday

it was a year 11ners party

im rather close to come of the year 11ners

and they had there fun

although there are some real dickheads in year 11

cause of the legislation that says kids cant leave school without a job

so

the assholes who were meant to leave

didnt

and now they outnumber us

50-1

and thats just there idiots against our grade

and sometimes

when you standing around

and you see them

chasing each other and 'man-handling' each other

as a way to release their homosexual tensions

and abusing any and everyone

you just want to...

just

slit there throats seriously

yes i am a sadist

but seriously

if i had a choice

it'd either be lady gag-a

or one of those dickheads

and now you know

thats right

don't fuck with me!

or i'll blog about you =P

now after the party i went to this thing that the council had

an outdoor movie screening

and the screen was small

and the pre-show entertainment made me want to puke

but!

the company was good

met some friends there and we just sat and talked and laughed

and i played guitar over the shitty band

and we watched the movie which was 'coraline'

which btw

is a complete and utter mind fuck

messed up childrens movie

i mean

if your moved somewhere remotish and

you found a fucking 50 year old doll that looked exactly like your wore your exact same clothes

well

i know i'd shit my pants

but yh

good company

good environment

movie under the stars

and on a hill as to encounter the cooling breeze

rather nice night

if i might say so my self

but what happend after if the important bit

and here's where i introduce Chloe

now chloe is someone i call a friend

shes in my ext class and is always smiling

yet always bitching about something

and thats why we love her

BUT!

chloe did something

after the movie

that ill never forgive her for

after the beginings of formal conversation introductional paradigms

i asked her ever so innocently what are your doing?

and she replied reading

which is out of the norm so i inquired as to what she was reading

to which she stabbed my cynical shield of apathy

by replying 'GMH'

i wont tell you what that means as to not let you fall victim to the

social manipulation that it instills

fucking people

and their stories on fucking hope

fucking chloe

fuck

I Was Thinking

oh shit i've just cut my lip on some fucking ice

like seriously

wtf?!

that doesnt happen to ANYBODY

cept maybe the guy whos skin melts on contact with water

but!

NOBODY else

and yet its happend to me

it rather hurts

but pressing on...

i was thinking...

i'd like to raise some money

so i can go travel the world

and i noe its not the usual cynical thought i have

and your can thank chloe for that

but i'd like to travel to japan being place #1

even though my japanese learning has basically come to a complete halt

i will start it again

but

like i said before

i really love the japanese culture and lifestyle etc

i'd like to travel with a friend or a few

but the one would be nice

if i had a choice on who to take

it'll have to be... introducing

KENAN!

kenan is the resident apeman

he funny as fuck

and can make any awkwad better by making it more awkwad XD

and so

even though he cant speak the language

i'd like him to go japan with me

god it sounds like i'm proposing =P

say yes kenan ^^

and i'd travel to japan and soak up the culture

then gather some WW2 enthusiast and form an army

then travel to america as japanese tourist

and if we get spoted we'd point at kenan and yell terrorist

as a diversion

but then again

it america

i can point at a mailbox and the airport security will jump on it

newho

we'd infiltrate the company

and systematically

electronically rob

every

single

rich

white

mother

fucker

and give all their money to

developing countries

and non for profit and non religious based charities

or form my own

adn as america's wealthy get poor and the poor around the world get the ability to live past a few months

the balance will be restored

and then we'll over throw the government!

and we'll take ove rthe world and form a one world government but

not some new world order shit

no it'll be a resource based economy

where technology if key

and people will have to do a minimal

and so

thats my thinking done for the day

i need to do maths

i bet my name is gonna get called up tomorrow at assembly

cause abdiogblahblah

is a douche

fuck!

completely ruins my image

=P

so yh

chloe i hate you

and bye

I smell a REbelion! or maybe...some bananas

yes yes i noe its been a while

but thats ok! because...

it just is

and so... it...begins

the past few weeks have been hell on friggin midguard (earth)

and year 12 is nothing but a fucking excuse for insecure, short, fat and bolding

gremlins who work at the board of studies, to feel in power by bossing around

people who are 30 years younger then them

i noe im certainly their bitch!

and so the assessments continue to come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and come

and before u know it ur left with the remains that he assessments left behind all over your floor and bed and walls and table and chair and even the roof

(btw i didnt ctrl+C-V that typed it all out T_T cause i dint think)

and yes i realise that i just made a sexual reference so go and cry to your mummies

8O!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OMFG! HE SPELT IT WITH A FUCKING U!!!!!!!!!! WTF IS THAT! THATS COMPLETELY MESSED UP

he must be like a total illaterat freek or sumting

really?

am i?

really?

well theres my literacy

thats based on proper english and use of english

literal techniques etc

THEN THERE THE FUCKING CRUDE ASS MUTHERFUCKING

PHONETICS BASED BULLSHIT THAT YOU IDIOTS

DECIDE IS BEST WAY TO MURDER THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE,

HACK IT UP AND SERVE THE FUCKING DRIBBLE TO THE REST OF THE WORLD THROUGH YOUR GODDAM MEDIA!

*composes self*

so

now you know

the internet, i'm afraid, does not allow for the dramatic affect of such outburst should they had been performed in real life. but i think i got my point across =)

it is hot as fucking hell in here

like crazy hot

its hot as hell out there

and its hot as hell in here

infact its even more hot in here

and people will tell me to open a window

but it doesnt work

hot air +more hot air = CRAZY HOT AIR well at least in my world it does

'and i have no idea why anyone would wanna live here its a prison

and the people audibly crackle at they walk past on the footpaths

and we live 3/4 of a kilometre away from the sun!'

(just to quote Mr Moran)

its been hot forever now

theres no end to it!

and i have to go through school!

and i have to walk home from the bus in the sun and heat!

and the wind is hot!

and the rain is hot!

and the day is humid!

AND i can't even fucking breathe!

AND THE WORSE PART IS I NOW SPENT MY FREE TIME IN THE LIBRARY CAUSE IT'S AIRCONNED!!

to sum it up

don't go to australia ever

cause

if you're from england

all you'll do when u get off the plane is go

'GOOD LORD ITS THE SUN!

Look! kids! its the sun can u see it! OH dear god its actually there i thought it was an urban myth! and how did they get rid of the rain! its amazing!'

and you'll laugh and play and jump around for about 30 seconds then melt

and if you're american then...

'...'

just dont come here

cause well i just don't ...

just dont come please

make people misserable there

if your asian you wouldnt come at all unless its on a boat

or u could get money out of it =P

see no need to get angry cause im mean to everyone ^^

AM currently re-learning:

Cute without the 'e'

by taking back sunday

(acoustic)

you can hear it here

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gf8ETy5cecg

FOR: Shannon

if your reading this then...

hey!

for those who do not know

shannon is the coolest Jap white person i know

shes smart

pretty

funny

pretty funny

witty

intelligent

insightful

and if u piss her off

she'll have something to say about it!

so now your know

so what was i saying?

oh yh

shannon i realise we had an awkwad 'i'm staring at you and you hate it'

moment

but rest assured

i looked at you

and then zoned out!

XD

creepy but i do that

alot

the worst times being on public transport

when i have half the train carriage of people

fixing their hair or checking their fly's

...

or moving

but i digress

a formal apology

but you cant blame me cause u sit their with your blue eyes and your constant smile

and its captivating ;)

don't change woman

I was thinking

well as you all know i get to thinking alot

and so

i was thinking

what would happen

if...

shit i forgot

its so hot

even now that its dark and the cool winds blowing its still hot

nehow

what would society be like if

there were no judea christian religions ever

never were never would be

the implications are massive

here is what i think society would be like

in a nutshell:

better

to elaborate:

there'd be no 'believe in our fair and kind loving creater...OR WE'LL KILL YOU!'

idiots

who go round talking up this guy who there was no proof for his existence in the first place

religion is not real people

seriously

has anyone really sat down and thought about it?

this is what to think about

-why do you have faith in mister invisible magical fairy in the sky?

---because you're afraid that if u don't live a vicarious bitch and give away all your money then you'll go to hell

NOW think even further then that!

so

god

heaven

is there

but only because

u dont go to hell

but if hell is in the same book (literally)

as heaven

then hell cannot exist

therefore

if

something that doesnt exist

scares you

and makes you believe in mystic flying juju buddy

then your an idiot

and therefore

he/she/shim

does not really exist

and if you cant process that argument then

don't go changing

stay a faithful religious person you're better off that way T_T

and so once again i've digressed

the world without religion

would be awesome

technology would be so advanced due to older specific and extremely influential scientist

like galileo would not have been chased by crazy mask wearing alterboys who ate his soul, then ate a dick, and he would have make more inventions and further astrological research etc.

SO!

this will be different

i wanna hear your comments on what you think the world would be like if

there were no religion, mainly that of the judea christian kind.

a friend of mine named ... said that someone she knew said that the fact that it was hot then started raining was the warning for the enset of the apocolypse! and so i read this in her blog and i LOL! my pants off

it was so funny

but more funny if you actually know the girl who said it

So enough of this!

i'm exhausted

bye

Time is of MY essence...

before begining to type

i was anxious

it was a cloud of impeding feelings that i have no bearing for meanings for

its the reason i have been more nervous lately and tis the reason for me not having blogged

for such a long time

i had no idea what to write

or how the reader would react to such things

but then i reaslised that noone reads this so i guess i should write it...

a few weeks ago

i wrote about how i had a laptop

that belonged to my sister who was on holiday so i went top get it fixed under the concensus that

it would then belong to me...

i knew that there would be blood when she returned

and i was seemingly ready for it

and so for 6 whole days

i was as happy as a 12 year old boy getting hold of his first porno mag

it was bliss

and come closer to the craken's return

i became nervous

as i had reason to be so

it just so happens that on the night that she was to return my parents went out

with my little brother

and so i was alone

i knew the storm was coming but i assumed my parents would return before it did

so i wasnt scared

however

they did not

and so the wicked witch of the west returned

and lubbed her fat ass to her room

and busted open my door

and demanded her laptop back

and i know your all thinking

'well its her lap top so u should give it back it belongs to her'

but look at it from my point of veiw

its not hers

my mum paid for it

and no real formal agreement of ownership between my mother and the sasquach

was ever reached

also

she broke it within a week

and on top of that blamed me

and because my father doesnt get involved and my mother doesnt like playing the bad guy rather the victim, didnt agree or dissagree leaving me to feel that she may belive what the

ogre says

and so she broke it

and left it

without letting me even touch it or go get it fixed

and it just was kept away

collecting dust

for months

and thats how we got to the current situation

back to pressing matters ->

and so she demands it back

i was playing LoL (league of legends)

at the time

and asked for some time to finish

(although i had no intention of giving it to her, hoping sed argument would hold out her wrath until my parents would return)...it didnt

she went mental

yelling

and screaming (which are the same yet somehow different for her)

and slapping

and all this i was prepared for

and i retaliated with a calm

'you don't need it right now, so just piss the FUCK OFF!'

and so she left

and i thought it was over

and i aassume it was

and i was dumb enough to believe it was

and i was stupid enough to not lock the door behind her

and i was baka enough to not run and hide when i had the chance

instead i went back to the game

and she came back

...

with a knife

that she took with her to coffs harbour

including through the supposed 'high tech' security of the airport

and she yelled

yelled her little fat squashed lungs out

and i got up

(as being seated is the position u do not want to be in when ur getting threatened by a knife)

i was scared

but not that scared

cause shes threatend me before

but then

after screaming alot

and suposedly arguing with me even though i had said a minimal dialogue

(really she yelled and then made assumptions to what my rebuttals would be successfully pissing herself off)

she took a slash at me

and not a 'this is what could happen' slash

but a 'fuck u your life ends here' slash

and it caught me off guard

but i was able to dodge it

with what ever little space i had

and after she did

i looked at her face and saw no self shock

no realisation of seriosity

no repenance at all... nothing

and i clicked in my head thinking i need to get the situation under control

before the bitch kills me

and i manned up (as in toughened up, sorta staunching)

and i fucking told her straight up 'that was completely serious and uncalled for

you'll get your fucking laptop back when im done which will at least be tonight'

and i stared her down cause shes a short whore

and she left

and i closed the door

and mother came home

and even though i did tell her that the demon hoe tried to kill me

my mother still did the usual of playing the victim complaining for having such fucked kids etc.

and so nothing was resolved

i gave the laptop back

but not after wiping it clean

or all my files

and any program that was on there

i did leave microsoft word on though

i really regretting that decision though T_T

shoulda just plain cleaned the fucking thing

and so the fact that she really tried to kill me and that i could of died

hit me

the next day

i had no sleep for about 3 days

[THERE WAS HEAPS OF EMOTIONAL SHIT HERE BUT I DECIDED THAT IT WASN'T IMPORTANT =D]

on a lighter note ...

i've started learning japanese

cause i love the language and culture and country

its goin ok (Y)

and i've started school again cause the holidays ended

im sad and kind of relieved

its another free excuse to see friends and people you love most

i wont tell anyone of how i feel execpt for this cyber community

because bringing these things up

and bothering otherss with it

and just selfish of me

i guess

thats my noble stand point

but really in just a coward

we all are...

I Was Thinking

how would life be

if

the internet didnt exist?

like serioulsy

do u web goers

fare safety and comfort without it?

u may say 'fuck yes we're not freaks'

but i dare say not

because u and me

are just as freaky as the 30 year old guy who

lives in his mother basement

is unemployed

and wears a horned nordic armour helm made of plastic as he yells at

other players online that he crushes with his mighty twilight sword

and gains massive exp from it etc etc etc

and we're freaky

not cause we do these things

cause i dont

but because there are other things that my do religiously

that give us comfort

because that guy

finds comfort in playing these games

and being physically alone instead of digitally

as long as he isnt menacing anyone, as long as his mother doesnt mind

then who the fuck are we?! to call him a freak?

u must admit

even though it may not be extensive as that

but even you will do something

maybe not every day

maybe not every week

but it is to be done

and to be done more then once

that makes u comfortable

whether its taking extreme pride in your possessions

like washing your car quite often even though u don't realy need to

keeping the front of your house cleaner then the neighbour's

having the same breakfast

having the same lunch

having the same dinner

meeting the same people

meeting the same collegues

meeting the same challenges

keeping face

showing face

cleaning face

showing a clean and well kept face!

the point it

it happens

and u may not realise it

but

standing in the mirror

everyday

combing your hair

and straightening your tie

u are

cleaning face

you are keeping the face clean

and u will show that face to everyone u do every day

and this

will make u comfortable

see the guy in the basement

may be different

but atleast he can admit that doin what he does makes him happy

for real

not 'of course im happy i have a great job and a great condo'

NO

its not that

thats not happiness!

that materialism at its finest

happiness

is spending

a mildly hot day at the beach

with close friends

its shopping

with people u trust and love to give u good advice

not family god no

but good

good friends

and knowing that u will tell them how to dress and to wear and buy them things im no selfishness of expect of emotional return

yet know that its there anyway

thats happiness

the feeling of being loved and needed

cause humans are naturally selfish

and crave the acceptance of others

and u find it in impressing people at work

and the NEET

in his mothers basement

finds it in impressing strangers who don't know what he looks like and who he really is and vice versa

and i kinda went off track there

but yeah

if the internet where to cease to exist right now

then we'd all be fucked

and acording to cox

if they took all the porn off the internet

there'd be no websites left

except one and it'd be called 'bring back the porn'

and so the saga ends

i may not get back to blogging i a while

i do apologise for returning on such a sour note

but i couldnt give less of a shit about you

cause i dont know you

and don't be shocked cause u know its true

bye

Whoa! Nelly! down girl!

so

its been about three days since i've blogged

only came hear cause i actually felt bad for not blogging =P

i havnt been blogging cause like normal theres nothing to blog

however if your find that my typing is horendous then blame that fact that im on a laptop

=D

MY laptop =D

=D

=D

see my sister bought this laptop

well my mother bought it for her

and she broke it within the first week or so

and woulodnt let me see it or go get it fixed for 6 fucking months

so its been collecting dust

and so now shes in coffs harbour

and i went to go get it fixed

and so now its mine =D

and when she gets back theres gonna be a shit storm

but i dont give a shit

WHOOOO!

newho

like i sed before theres not much to report

its a thursday

and its about 3 pm right now

yesterday i was sposed to go hapkido and teakwondo

but i got violently ill and vomited everything i had inside

T_T it wasnt pretty

but now im kinda better

but i my neck hurts from sleeping like a retard

IF YOU BUILD IT THEY WILL COME

I WAS THINKING

what would happen if america didnt exist?

like seriously

think of the implecations there

we wouldnt have stupid peolpe to tease

thered be noone goin round killing at random

because thered be no:

-americans in america killing each other with there legal guns

-americans in other countries fucking up everyone they see using war as an excuse

-terrorist (not that there are) trying to attack america

-racism wouldnt be such an issue in the modern world

america will not have gone round backrupting countries and corrupting leaders of small oil rich countries people will be richer

the poor will be better off

there wouldnt be such an economic dependance on 'wall street' cause it wouldnt exist

and the economic dependance will be spread more evenly thoguhout the world and so a downturn in one place will not effect everyone else so heavily

i mean i don't hate america per se

its just that u can't are this point

and americans don;t get all defensive about it

cause im not talking about u

its your governments and the rulling elite who are fucking u guys up

so your all idiots if u don;t know this

thats the point there

i think u'r all idiots cause u don;t know more about whats happening to u

for instance there is no law saying u need to pay tax

yet u all do it

not for the greater good or not for patriotism

but because u've been told thats whats need to be done

there u go

and thats it for today

idk if ill blog again in a while

=P

remember

i don't claim to be perfect

Modest Intervention...

so as most of your may know

here

is holidays

and in the great holiday spirit

i spend most of my daytimes

sitting at home

doing nothing

and

its a monday today

and my mother has a day off

so she took me shopping

however i have no idea why i went

at first i thought it was to go fix my megabitch sister's laptop which she broke within a week of purchase and its still pretty much brand new...

and so it was promised to me should i go get it fixed, due to the fact that my sister is stupidfacedbitchtits whos so arrogant that until she left for coffs harbour at the beginning of this week, she wouldnt let me near the laptop.

so anywho i get in the car and my mum says we cant go get the laptop fixed T_T

and still forces me to go with her

and it went like this

-took my little brother to the dentist

-went to bonnyrigg plaza so my mother can go library

-went to aldi for groceries (yh we shop at aldi get over it, same shit different smell)

-went home

now your tell me where in that trip am i involved at all cept for home and helping to carry groceries

...

WHERE!

so is the stress of shopping with adult asians T_T

infact im really surprised that we didnt one visit Cabbramatta

NOT ONCE!

i was kinda worried

there might be something wrong with mum

no boat asian goes shoping without visiting cabbra

idk imma keep an eye on her

so i went home and was bored off my nuts

its rediculous

how bored i was all day

and my mum basically annoyed the fuck outta me

comes in my small enough room

'clean this! and this! and this! and this mess that im standing directly on and wont move off for a while! right now!'

fucking hate it when people do that

tell u do something and get in the fucking way!

yh

alot of things shit me

but tis things that should shit me

not stupid irrelevant things

when people get the shits from stupid shit

that shits me

alot

person 1-'man i hate it when theres too many water pools on the road'

me- T_T are u serious? we're not even on the road

person 1-'i noe...still shits me'

me-fucking idiot *walks off*

I Was Thinking

i wish i had my p's and a car

which is a bit of a continuation of yesterdays thoughts less the happy car

if i had my p's i could

go visit rachna at work like i said i would

cause she works i a place thats just completely out of reach from public transport

and i could drive everywhere i need to go

and refuse people lifts

and slow down for hitch hickers and then drive off

or say 'can u put your bag in the boot?'

and then they do and THEN i drive off

Mwuahahahahahahahahahaha

god damn im evil =P

i don't even belive in god

but god damn it all!

god damn it all to hell!

mwuahahahaha

thats right i sed it

now what?

thats right

thats what i thought

so if your decide to came to dury lane

visit me

i'll be staying over the muffin man's house

me and him

great buddies

good times and bad

like the desaster with the milk spill

...he was in hostpital for months

took him ages to dry out and recover

but hes better now

Ball soup... all day

For those who don't know what ball soup is

it's been a scorcher of a day

use your imagination ;)

its 2 am right now

and i can't get over the fact that

1- the weather is the biggest dickhead in the global playground

2- my aircon has been broken for about 2 months now

and my asian parents won't get it fixed, according to them if it blows air it works T_T

so

sitting

in your god knows what heat

with two fans that do nothing cept blow the hot air around

and u sit and sit

talking on msn

trying not to think of the people juice oozing out of your skin at an alarming rate

and u get up

walk to the living room

decide to walk outside

...

and find out that theres a cool ass mutherfucking breeze just merrilly blowing through your street

and according to people

that breeze has been there for a while

and u step back into your house and realise that its an oven T_T

holy crap here comes jesus

and he doesn't look too happy!

so anywho

i turn off my defective heater/aircon

open every window in my house

and though it is hot

its not as hot as before

... slight relief ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

facebook

i go on facebook

i see how people are on facebook

i don't do much on facebook

if you talk to me on facebook i'll talk back

if u ask me to join a group and i like it, i'll join

if u tag me in a photo ill look at it and reply to comments

but!

i will not

talk to people on facebook unless they've said something funny or stupid and it needs pointing out

i won't ask anyone to join a group for any reason because its annoying

and i hardly photosize anyway

so yh

facebook

the downfall of society

happy facebooking people

meshelle talked to me on facebook today

and i talked back

...on her facebook

and so i learnt that rawr means iloveu in dinosaur

because they reserve only word in their vocabulary for such important phrases T_T

and also

boo means the save in ghost

because apparently even ghost need loving too

and the two together make!

RAWRRBOO!

love as result of thousands of years of genetic mutation due to nuclear war and scientific gene mutilation (which led to the downfall of humanity) and left behind only the ghost dinosaurs

and thats how they say iloveu... now you know

so next time u meet a dinosaur with sharp teeth and long claws and he/she says Rawrr then show em some lovin give em a hug like right in front of its big mouth T_T that'll sure teach it

...

if u see a ghost and it says boo

u run the fuck outta there

u don't want no ghost goin up and cramping your style shiet =P

teenagers i'll never understand em

never want to...EVER

dw meshelle if your reading this i still love you =P

and i understand u ^_^

btw

i've said 'facebook' 10 times

i bet you wanna go see how your facebook is doing right bouat now =P

newho

vacated my preheated airconless house to my cousins house

and scabbed aircon air off her

and played on my other cousins lappy (thats laptop u sick perverted freaks)

played a game called LOL (league of legend) and had fun till the point where i started loosing

we went out to eat at golden king

or something

its in green valley

and i was kinda dissapointed

the prices where rediculous

and the portions were even worse

and she ordered generic food

like special rice

and sizzling mongolian lamb and sezchwaun chicken

and it wasnt that great and she full talked it up and if your reading this cousin

i'm dissapointed =P

and i bet u are as well woman (it's SANTON chicken)

the bitch excuse for a sister of mine is in Coffs Harbour so i have 10 days of slight peace

but it also means i have to do all her fucking chores

thats like 10 on the 10000 that i already do T_T

i was thinking that

if i had a car

that could run on happyness

that'd be sweet

i'd be happy all the time because I HAVE THE CAR

so its a self sufficient car

man i'd take it everywhere

and it'd a compact unregistered new car

and i'll call it a smaller intermode transport

so its in the same devision as a bike

and so fuck getting a license

and it'll go up to speeds of 100km and hour

any higher and your not really happy u must be on some kind of pills

and i'd take to the streets

and then i'd know when i pass a depressed person cause then the car would slow down or stop

and then i'd be all like hey are u sad

and they'd be all like

'no what ever do u mean'?

and then i'd be like comon u sad sack'a crap come see my new car

and i'd show em my new car and they'd be happy

and they'd ask to give it a go and i'd say

'sure...in your dreams buddy!'

hop in and drive away

...

what?

y should i be responsible for sad people?

sides its my car! =P

stupid people and their assumption of responsibility T_T

so yesterday amy told me to learn a song called i just want you by aj rafael

and i full tabbed it out myself and it took hours cause i'm noob and i got passed the chorus and took a break, came back at night

and khiem goes on msn and

in a complete coinkidink

he asked me how to play the song

and im like i full tabed it out

and told him what chords it was

and hes like 'you can find that on ultimate guitar' and im like XD

are u fucking serious?!

guess i shoulda thought of that first =P

the strumming is hard

and i was getting into learning it

and then khiem

sent me a guitarpro file

of '1000 miles' by that venessa chick

and its on guitar and i was like no fucking way!

...

THIS IS AWESOME!

and i've learnt some of it and its hard and shit but i;m getting there =P

........

.......

hang....on

...let me catch...my

....breath

so....

whats new in your life?

thats ok

keep at it

(thats my session of caring done)

and thats all i can muster

if you have time

download a song i learnt on guitar called 'shimmer' by fuel

you'll listen to it and go 'OMG I KNOW THIS SONG ITS SO OLD ITS AWESOME'

dont ever do that around me!

night/morning